What is something you wouldn't want the guys to know?

Okay I got ya all beat. I read every Twilight novel and saw both of the first movies. Now give it to me. For the record none of you told your top dog like I did.

lol ive seen both of the movies but havnt read the books.

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

Okay I got ya all beat. I read every Twilight novel and saw both of the first movies. Now give it to me. For the record none of you told your top dog like I did.

I got suckered into watching that first movie on a blind date and hated it, but you arent alone bro, I know plenty of goth kids that like those books and movies

lol jk bro, seriously though I do know quite a few people, both guys and girls that like those books and movies.

i take pride in being a michigan fan bub not embarrased at all ive been a fan for years through the good and bad.

my buddies rode me out for it. I started reading the first book with my 8 year old daughter and got hooked. At New Moon I took the kids and there was 5 gay dudes talking crazy. I wanted to beat the shit out of one of them bad, but I had the kids and there was 5 of them. That would have been bad more than likely.

josh200612 wrote:

i take pride in being a michigan fan bub not embarrased at all ive been a fan for years through the good and bad.

it was sarcasm lol

i know lol just putting it out there

When i watch Titanic I cry alittle every time lol. I farted once when I was sick and shit my pants and didnt throw the pants away lol.

I have watched Lost since day 1.

GolbeZ wrote:

I have watched Lost since day 1.

Funny I stopped after season 2 and just started season 3 on hulu this morning. I WILL watch them all in the long run. That doesn't count GobleZ. Bring some noise! You have to have a barbie in your closet now tell it!

timthebim wrote:

When i watch Titanic I cry alittle every time lol. I farted once when I was sick and shit my pants and didnt throw the pants away lol.

I have never seen a man or woman cry as hard as a huge fat dude when I went to see Titanic with my ex back in the day. He was loud crying. I felt like giving him a hug almost. Instead I pointed and laughed at him and my girlfriend at the time yelled at me.

Timmy you reminded me of a great...and horrible...story that happened to me at work a few years ago...

This is something I would never wish on my worst enemy and it's going to be a tad long so if you don't want to read I understand.

Binged on jaeger bombs one night until I was completely shit-canned and had to get up at 6AM the next day to go to work. I made it in, barely, but I was feeling horrible. It was a Friday so my floor was semi-empty thank God, but there were still people in the building for sure.

First of all...I wear boxers...I'm not going to get into an argument about what type of underpants are best...for me it's boxers. I was standing at a file cabinet and felt a fart brewing so I lifted a leg and let'er rip...bad move.

The fart was not a fart at all, it was a stream of juicy, stinky, shit. Don't forget, I wear boxers, which do not catch much of the juicy shit at all. Most of the shit slides down my leg, staining my pants all the way down.

I quickly retreated to the handicapped bathroom stall and stripped down to nothing but my t-shirt. Then I realize I didn't get any napkins to attempt a cleaning job on my pants. I'm butt ass naked except for a t-shirt when I dart from the stall to the sink where I tossed my stained boxers in the trash and grabbed a handful of napkins. Upon returning to the stall I dipped the napkins in the toilet water and tried my best to wipe the shit from my pants. My efforts were mostly futile. The stains were very visible and the stench was unmistakeable.

I reluctantly put my pants back on and returned to work. At that time I rode a bus to and from work in Houston so I could not just hop in my truck and go home to change. I did have some febreze, though, which I used to mask the smell frequently throughout the day.

I worked the next 6 hours or so free-balling it with shit stains up and down my drawers. It was the longest day of my life. I saw and conversed with many people throughout the day and if they noticed my accident they did a good job of hiding their discust.

I'm sure the poor lady I sat next to on the bus ride home had a hunch that I had shat my pants, though.

The moral of the story? Jaeger bomb farts are not a good idea unless you have a change of clothes.

Bigs03 wrote:

Timmy you reminded me of a great...and horrible...story that happened to me at work a few years ago...

This is something I would never wish on my worst enemy and it's going to be a tad long so if you don't want to read I understand.

Binged on jaeger bombs one night until I was completely shit-canned and had to get up at 6AM the next day to go to work. I made it in, barely, but I was feeling horrible. It was a Friday so my floor was semi-empty thank God, but there were still people in the building for sure.

First of all...I wear boxers...I'm not going to get into an argument about what type of underpants are best...for me it's boxers. I was standing at a file cabinet and felt a fart brewing so I lifted a leg and let'er rip...bad move.

The fart was not a fart at all, it was a stream of juicy, stinky, shit. Don't forget, I wear boxers, which do not catch much of the juicy shit at all. Most of the shit slides down my leg, staining my pants all the way down.

I quickly retreated to the handicapped bathroom stall and stripped down to nothing but my t-shirt. Then I realize I didn't get any napkins to attempt a cleaning job on my pants. I'm butt ass naked except for a t-shirt when I dart from the stall to the sink where I tossed my stained boxers in the trash and grabbed a handful of napkins. Upon returning to the stall I dipped the napkins in the toilet water and tried my best to wipe the shit from my pants. My efforts were mostly futile. The stains were very visible and the stench was unmistakeable.

I reluctantly put my pants back on and returned to work. At that time I rode a bus to and from work in Houston so I could not just hop in my truck and go home to change. I did have some febreze, though, which I used to mask the smell frequently throughout the day.

I worked the next 6 hours or so free-balling it with shit stains up and down my drawers. It was the longest day of my life. I saw and conversed with many people throughout the day and if they noticed my accident they did a good job of hiding their discust.

I'm sure the poor lady I sat next to on the bus ride home had a hunch that I had shat my pants, though.

The moral of the story? Jaeger bomb farts are not a good idea unless you have a change of clothes.

Man I feel bad for you. I would have left sick. That story was hilarious. I love how you put it together. I went through the whole process and felt for you yet lmao the whole story

Cu Bua wrote:

err pissing outside is natural


I only drink smirnoff ice no beer.

this one is better than yours BBC.

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

GolbeZ wrote:

I have watched Lost since day 1.

Funny I stopped after season 2 and just started season 3 on hulu this morning. I WILL watch them all in the long run. That doesn't count GobleZ. Bring some noise! You have to have a barbie in your closet now tell it!

went down on a girl for awhile with a lot of bush ..

GolbeZ wrote:

Cu Bua wrote:

err pissing outside is natural


I only drink smirnoff ice no beer.

this one is better than yours BBC.

I actually agree with you and laugh about it more now.

GolbeZ wrote:

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

GolbeZ wrote:

I have watched Lost since day 1.

Funny I stopped after season 2 and just started season 3 on hulu this morning. I WILL watch them all in the long run. That doesn't count GobleZ. Bring some noise! You have to have a barbie in your closet now tell it!

went down on a girl for awhile with a lot of bush ..

got that beat too

Try a pregnant one that has grown from the size of a pecan to a football. I have had alot of kids and you know I had to earn it some nights. Very rarely did she let it get like a jungle, but lets just say she wasn't batting 100% thru all the pregnancies. I actually had Breast milk sguirt in my eye when I squeezed one on a certain night. Freaked me out for a second. I actually saw a spitting cobra for a flash of a second, lol

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

GolbeZ wrote:

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

GolbeZ wrote:

I have watched Lost since day 1.

Funny I stopped after season 2 and just started season 3 on hulu this morning. I WILL watch them all in the long run. That doesn't count GobleZ. Bring some noise! You have to have a barbie in your closet now tell it!

went down on a girl for awhile with a lot of bush ..

got that beat too

Try a pregnant one that has grown from the size of a pecan to a football. I have had alot of kids and you know I had to earn it some nights. Very rarely did she let it get like a jungle, but lets just say she wasn't batting 100% thru all the pregnancies. I actually had Breast milk sguirt in my eye when I squeezed one on a certain night. Freaked me out for a second. I actually saw a spitting cobra for a flash of a second, lol

bahaha. great stuff.

Cu Bua wrote:

err pissing outside is natural


I only drink smirnoff ice no beer.

skimmed through 4 pages and have to say I gave it up like a girl at prom who is starving for attention.


for the record When we go see fights or watch Ufc somewhere I get razzed by all my beer loving friends. Its not untill I threaten violence that I get off the hook untill the next time

I found something to counter the constant urge to pick my nose. Go to Walmart and buy the store brand extra-moisturizing nasal spray. It works wonders.

Big East, your story was weak. Reading Twilight would just make me think that the wife and kids are a cover for late night "milk" runs that happened to involve a respite at a truck stop. Not a huge thing. You had my hopes up for something classic.

Bigs03 takes the cake with the poop at work story. One of my best friends has the same story. Disaster seems to follow this guy. His first sexual experience he couldn't get hard because he was too nervous, and was once caught peeping at his neighbor changing clothes by her parents. The dude is Ben Stiller in Something about Mary or Meet the Parents.

josh200612 wrote:

i watch desperate housewives! ive seen every episode so far thats what i look forward to sunday nights since dexter is off till june o and entourage is about to start up but back to the subject i also own chick flicks lol. the one i watch the most when it is on would have to be the wedding planner idk y but i love that movie. i also own sex and the city seasons and the movie the girls love that when they see that at my place lol.

And we have a winner

GolbeZ wrote:

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

GolbeZ wrote:

I have watched Lost since day 1.

Funny I stopped after season 2 and just started season 3 on hulu this morning. I WILL watch them all in the long run. That doesn't count GobleZ. Bring some noise! You have to have a barbie in your closet now tell it!

went down on a girl for awhile with a lot of bush ..

question is did you stay down there?

Bigs03 wrote:

Timmy you reminded me of a great...and horrible...story that happened to me at work a few years ago...

This is something I would never wish on my worst enemy and it's going to be a tad long so if you don't want to read I understand.

Binged on jaeger bombs one night until I was completely shit-canned and had to get up at 6AM the next day to go to work. I made it in, barely, but I was feeling horrible. It was a Friday so my floor was semi-empty thank God, but there were still people in the building for sure.

First of all...I wear boxers...I'm not going to get into an argument about what type of underpants are best...for me it's boxers. I was standing at a file cabinet and felt a fart brewing so I lifted a leg and let'er rip...bad move.

The fart was not a fart at all, it was a stream of juicy, stinky, shit. Don't forget, I wear boxers, which do not catch much of the juicy shit at all. Most of the shit slides down my leg, staining my pants all the way down.

I quickly retreated to the handicapped bathroom stall and stripped down to nothing but my t-shirt. Then I realize I didn't get any napkins to attempt a cleaning job on my pants. I'm butt ass naked except for a t-shirt when I dart from the stall to the sink where I tossed my stained boxers in the trash and grabbed a handful of napkins. Upon returning to the stall I dipped the napkins in the toilet water and tried my best to wipe the shit from my pants. My efforts were mostly futile. The stains were very visible and the stench was unmistakeable.

I reluctantly put my pants back on and returned to work. At that time I rode a bus to and from work in Houston so I could not just hop in my truck and go home to change. I did have some febreze, though, which I used to mask the smell frequently throughout the day.

I worked the next 6 hours or so free-balling it with shit stains up and down my drawers. It was the longest day of my life. I saw and conversed with many people throughout the day and if they noticed my accident they did a good job of hiding their discust.

I'm sure the poor lady I sat next to on the bus ride home had a hunch that I had shat my pants, though.

The moral of the story? Jaeger bomb farts are not a good idea unless you have a change of clothes.

And second place goes to bigs

boomer sooner wrote:

Big East, your story was weak. Reading Twilight would just make me think that the wife and kids are a cover for late night "milk" runs that happened to involve a respite at a truck stop. Not a huge thing. You had my hopes up for something classic.

Bigs03 takes the cake with the poop at work story. One of my best friends has the same story. Disaster seems to follow this guy. His first sexual experience he couldn't get hard because he was too nervous, and was once caught peeping at his neighbor changing clothes by her parents. The dude is Ben Stiller in Something about Mary or Meet the Parents.

Didn't seem like a complete let down. I meant girly type things which I had said five times in this thread. I have had alot of embarrassing moments like that. You called down the thunder well now you got it!
I was 21 years old and got shitty drunk off shots of tequila and L.I. teas. I was puking after getting into it with a bouncer and the cops were pulling up to arrest me on down the road from the club. They cuff me and call an EMT since I had alcohol poisining. The EMT tells the cops to uncuff me because I had to go to the hospital. I was drunk, but played them well. I did puke a little more and passed out in the hospital. When I woke up I was still feeling bad. I didn't know my lil sister was there to pick me up. The nurse wanted to see if I could walk and told me to walk a line. I did that and noticed I had the biggest wood I have ever seen. (in a hospital gown). My lil sister is standing there red as hell and I look down and go oh my God. Then the nurse who was embarrassed for me told me to sit on my bed and they would give me a few minutes to change so I could leave. The whole car ride home I was still sick, but didn't say a word about that erection who since has never appeared as big as that drunken morning.