Worst MMA Fights Ever

http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-10-worst-mma-fights-of-all-time/

This article is hilarious just for this fight write up:

Harold Howard vs Royce Gracie UFC 3

"In his first UFC fight, he kept his skills secret by winning via caveman seizure. In his next fight, he was set to face Royce Gracie, a jiu-jitsu fighter one tenth his size who everyone knows dominated the first 2 UFC tournaments. Harold was ready for him. He claimed to be the 1984 Canadian jiu-jitsu champion as if that’s a thing and honestly thought this would be two grand masters testing their skills against each other. Harold Howard even had a system that promised to bring the “karate aspect back to jiu-jitsu” which means so much less than nothing that several of those words took injuries during the sentence. This big goofy idiot was doomed. It was like a giant foot coming for his ass and Harold was the only one who didn’t see it.

The time finally came to fight Royce. We huddled around the VCR as if Harold Howard was a sleeping camper and Royce was about to put his hand in warm water. This clueless bastard is going to piss himself! Then, just as the fight started, Royce’s corner threw in the towel. He was too injured from his previous fight to go on and that meant that Harold Howard, a man living in the center of a sex offender Halloween costume, was going to the UFC finals. To call this a victory is like calling a lobster attack a handjob– inaccurate and demeaning to everything involved.

In the tournament finals, Harold missed with a somersault kick that was so awesome it unfortunately depleted his entire doughy body’s supply of karate. He lost and soon faded into obscurity. Then one day he wandered into a newspaper office covered in blood and told them he was injected with a substance that was slowly hardening inside him. While that might explain the way he fights or why he would sit still for that haircut, it’s still batshit crazy and they kicked him out. He left muttering, “On to Plan B.” Plan B turned out to be doing too many pills, attacking his sister and nephew with a hammer, and then driving his truck into a casino. Which leads me to my point: Harold Howard has forgotten more about not giving a fuck than you and I will ever know."

Ive read that article countless times it is great, funny thing is I have seen articles with Ken vs Royce 2 as the NUMBER 1 MMA FIGHT ALL TIME yet it also shows up on the worst list

Ken vs Dan 2 was horrible but what do you expect when your threatened by police, and yes of course i watched that PPV live

kalib starnes vs Nate Quarry

Cu Bua wrote:

kalib starnes vs Nate Quarry

funny ass fight!

Sakuraba vs. Gilles Arsene

Nobuhiko Takada vs Mike Bernardo

i love how they say Gilles fought worst than the french in WW1

Anderson Silva vs Thales Lietes and Damien Maia

Fedor vs Linland

Ken Shamrock vs Dan Severn 2
Kazushi Sakuraba vs Royce Gracie 1

When I want to watch poor MMA, I watch the M-1 Challenger Series on TV. Sometimes you get a really good bout though.

Mr.Howard is currently doing five years in the joint in Canada,for attempted murder and a sundry of other charges.

did his attempted murder include the somersault kick

bwahahaha

I made a funny

The first part of the Harold Howard write up is the best

Harold Howard was a walking police sketch. He was a crazy-eyed hillbilly with a mullet and his idea of fitness seemed to be funnel-filtered light beer. Now keep in mind that back at UFC 3, we still thought that a black belt in tae kwon do made you a badass. We were all sure that any day, some 90-year-old Shaolin monk would hear about this “U.F.C.” and show up to magically fireball everyone to death. But even in our naivety, we took one look at Harold Howard and knew that this is a man who takes karate with 3rd graders; a man with a 0-and-35 record against local law enforcement and 7 no-contests against his wife.

The guy went after his sister and nephew with a hammer,broke into his ex-wife's home and crashed his car into a casino while being chased by the fuzz.All this got him less than five years in the pen.Ain't Canada wonderful?

Primetyme199 wrote:

Nobuhiko Takada vs Mike Bernardo

Easily the winner.

Primetyme199 wrote:

Nobuhiko Takada vs Mike Bernardo

all time worst

GDPofDRC wrote:

Primetyme199 wrote:

Nobuhiko Takada vs Mike Bernardo

all time worst

Did they actually get payed for that? WTF I feel like I could take both of them on at the same time

Possibly another worked Takada fight?

its hard to imagine a great like Sakuraba looking up to such a shitty fighter like Takada

It's a pro wrestler thing

I know NJ its just mind boggling its like ok Kazushi look up to the dude as a wrestler but dont act like hes some great MMA expert the dude sucked

Joe Son contributed more to the arts

The last 2 GSP fights were boring as hell.

watch the links of the Takada fight and GSPs fights will look like Rocky movies sooners haha

Birdofthad wrote:

watch the links of the Takada fight and GSPs fights will look like Rocky movies sooners haha

Well at least the Takada fight didnt look like one guy dry humping another guy for 25 min.