Tim tell us your tale

What's up? What happened? Don't be shy

She told she was 18. I swear. Now I'm doing 9 months.

The details of my life are quite inconsequential ... Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize; he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament ... My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon ... luge lessons ... In the spring, we'd make meat helmets ... When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really. At the age of 12, I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Vilmer ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum — it's breathtaking ... I suggest you try it.

OU wrote:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential ... Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize; he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament ... My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon ... luge lessons ... In the spring, we'd make meat helmets ... When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really. At the age of 12, I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Vilmer ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum — it's breathtaking ... I suggest you try it.

Even though it is Dr.Evil, I stole that from Bigs. I couldn't find the thread where he used it. It was a very early thread were posters gave some details about their lives.

It's still a great monologue regardless.

Ali wrote:

It's still a great monologue regardless.

I agree. It's hilarious.

Wtf did timmah do?

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

Wtf did timmah do?

You know Charlie's weird uncle in Sunny ? well that's Tim.

Timthebim + coaching all girls t-ball team = trouble, perhaps?

https://ninjasplace.forumotion.net/t18247-so-im-coaching-a-girls-tee-ball-team?highlight=im+coaching+the+girls+tball+team

His posting has decreased dramatically since he took the gig. I hope tim didnt mess up.

I warned him

Guys Im fine. Just been busy with work and coaching and all the other stresses of life. Glad to know u guys are worried about all those poor little girls I coached lol.

We have our reasons timmeh.

bigbeastcardinal12 wrote:

We have our reasons timmeh.

Probably so lol.

I found out the reason for Tim's absence.

LMAO!!!!!!