Its OU texas week. Bitches

How do you get an UT graduate off your porch?............................................ ......pay him for the pizza

What does an UT graduate say to an OU grad?.......................................Welcom e to McDonalds, can I take your order?

How do you keep an UT student busy for a month? ...........Give him a package of M & M's and tell him to alphabetize them.
An UT grad is driving home from work when his cell phone rings. He answers and his wife says "honey just wanted to warn you and let you know that I am watching the news and some idiot is driving on the wrong side of the interstate." The UT grad then replied " honey I am already on my way home, but your wrong it is not one idiot but hundreds of them."


Albert Einstein goes to a party. He introduces himself to a lady and says, "Hi, I'm Albert Einstein. What's you're IQ?".........."240," she says. "Great, we can discuss the mysteries of the universe and other things. We have a lot we can talk about " he replies. Later he is talking with a man and says, "Hi, I'm Albert Einstein. What's you're IQ?"......."145," he replies. "Great, we can talk about thermodynamics," says Albert. Later he is talking to another gentleman and says, "Hi, I'm Albert Einstein. What's you're IQ?........"43," the man manages to say. Einstein gets a puzzled look on his face for a minute then says, "How about them Longhorns?"


An UT grad was swirling from left to right on the road in his car. He was doing this for five minutes. Finally a cop pulls over and asks him, "Sir, why are you swirling from left to right?" The UT grad replies, "Well officer I was driving along when I saw a tree. I had to move left until I saw another tree. Practically everywhere I went, I saw a tree and I had to keep turning." Then the cop said, "Sir, that's your air freshener."


Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for 6 days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel found him resting on the 7th day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downward through the clouds. "I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance." "Balance?", inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth. "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while Southern Europe is gong to be poor, the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. Over there, I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people" God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid, while this one will be very cold and covered with ice." The archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a beautiful land in the center of a large mass. "What is that one?" "Ah" , said God. "That is Oklahoma, the most glorious place on Earth. There's beautiful lakes, rivers, and streams, and prairie. The people from Oklahoma are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous, and they are going to be found traveling the world. They will be extremely sociable, hard-working and high achieving and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. I'm also going to give them a super human football team which will be admired and feared by all who come across them." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there will always be balance." God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the loud-mouth morons I'm putting next to them. I will call it TEXAS"


A Sooner fan and a Longhorns fan are standing on the banks of the Red River yelling across at each other about which team is better. Suddenly, a Genie pops out of thin air and grants each fan one wish.
The Texas fan pipes out, "I'll go first." The genie agrees and allows the Texas fan to annouce his wish first. "I want to build a wall that is 300 feet high and 100 feet thick around the state of Texas to keep all those Sooner fans out." The genie agrees and POOF, a wall 100 feet high and 100 feet thick pops up around the entire state of Texas.
The genie then turns toward the Oklahoma fan and asks, "So what is your wish?" The Oklahoma fan points toward the giant wall and says, "Fill'er up."

The classic.
Why is it so windy in Oklahoma? Because Texas sucks and Kansas blows.

Q: What do you get when you cross a University of Texas fan and a pig?

A: Nothing. There's some things that a pig will not do.

: What's the only sign of intelligent life in Austin?

A: Norman: 187 Miles

are they playing at 330?

josh200612 wrote:

are they playing at 330?

3:30 Eastern Time yes.

1-5 cough cough

sokolkevin wrote:

1-5 cough cough

See you Monday

^ you know it man. Hell hope to see you manana after the upset tonight. WAR MANVEL

sokolkevin wrote:

1-5 cough cough

65-13 cough cough cough

An UT grad was swirling from left to right on the road in his car. He was doing this for five minutes. Finally a cop pulls over and asks him, "Sir, why are you swirling from left to right?" The UT grad replies, "Well officer I was driving along when I saw a tree. I had to move left until I saw another tree. Practically everywhere I went, I saw a tree and I had to keep turning." Then the cop said, "Sir, that's your air freshener."

Red River Rivalry WOOOOH

AN GAMEDAY IS IN EUGENE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

GO DUCKS

Birdofthad wrote:

Red River Rivalry WOOOOH

AN GAMEDAY IS IN EUGENE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

GO DUCKS

Luck vs Duck. Better watch out.

This would be a cool pic if the chicks were hot

They're busted in the bigger pic

tolivendiewithLA wrote:

They're busted in the bigger pic

I'd fuck Texas.

Look for the bigger pic, she'd fuck you

tolivendiewithLA wrote:

This would be a cool pic if the chicks were hot

Gay much?

Look for the big pic

Wolfgangsta wrote:

tolivendiewithLA wrote:

This would be a cool pic if the chicks were hot

Gay much?

ya for real LA are you?

texas is fine ou not so much.

Thank you sir, Sooners chick is busted, Texas is like a 6.2

tolivendiewithLA wrote:

Thank you sir, Sooners chick is busted, Texas is like a 6.2

thats an 8 to me buddy

Nothing 2 paper bags or a light switch wouldn't fix.

im always kind of weird about girls not smiling ive been fooled before by the teeth ugh.